Parenting is very different to emotional being there for your children,
That requires next-level commitment,
It requires detachment even when we feel so closely tied to them,
To surrender control,
Be there but allow them to forge their own way,
To watch them smile, dream, hurt and experience Life,
The good, bad and ugly.
Before we know it our sense of self is based more around who we are as a parent, rather than who we are as a person.
The responsibility, the expectation and the pressure that is both self-appointed and societal weighs us down and consumes our every thought…
Our happiness is deeply nestled into theirs,
As we become so determined to not let our mistakes become theirs,
Our connection to self is attached to theirs…
Feeling Pleasure that isn’t derived from them feels so foreign in our skin it feels like it doesn’t belong,
… Until we reach the point where we are exhausted,
Lost
Confused
And who we are as a person is a distant memory…
Our fantasies are a promise of the Pleasure that is available to us,
They are for us…
Little snippets of promises of the joy that is available to us now,
When we remember that our Pleasure is for us first,
Who are you when you aren’t parenting,
Thinking about your kids,
Worrying about your kids,
Guiding your kids,
Doing things for your kids,
Who are you then?
Taking small pockets of time to melt into exploring, being and living who you are without the parenting piece.
Follow the aliveness and measure where you are a little too comfortable, controlling a little bit too much and feel the fantasy that plays out in your mind when you drift off into the unknown.
Take action on the aliveness, what is it guiding you to do? Remember that it arrives piece by piece so don’t wait for the entire picture to drop, it reveals itself piece by piece once we do the thing.
When we are centred in our Pleasure we are a much better Parent because we are modelling and transmitting a frequency that says, I know who I am and I choose to feel good.
When over-giving people pleasing become parents who are on a one-way street to burn out unless they become centred in THEIR Pleasure.
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